February 1,2007 Life. Death. Reality.

Well, Silas *is* finally growing. I have proof. Not only is he out stretching his clothes, but the doctor's visit confirmed it. He is a whopping 17lbs 3oz. and is maintaining his growth curve at the sixth percentile. His length however, is exceeding his growth curve and he has now "inched" his way into the fiftieth percentile. Way to go Little Bear!

Now, about this whole crawling thing; I may have been excited and cheering him on when he first started, but he now goes everywhere! Under the table for scraps; to the dog's kennel for scraps; to the runner of the sliding glass door for scraps; you get the idea. I think I have officially made the transition from paranoid, germ-phobic mommy to "Oh Silas, don't eat that!" mommy. And now we pay the price. We all recently got colds that lasted a couple days but Silas can't seem to shake his. He can't eat without coughing/choking/gagging/vomiting, his eyes water constantly, he has a fever. And the stuff that comes out of his nose. . . ! Steven Spielburg could use it in his Sci-Fi movies. This has made for some very slapstick humor. Last night while feeding this squirming mucus producer, he took a spoonful of cottage cheese mixed with veggies and gravy, sloshed it in his mouth long enough to coat it and then proceeded to sneeze.

I had chunks fall from my hair for crying out loud! (And I don't think I need to add that I almost added to the chunks at my feet.) The older kids thought this was a great prank to pull on Mom and were glad that they themselves could not be blamed. Needless to say it has been a serious laundry week. If he doesn't start feeling better tomorrow, I'll take him in to make sure it is just a virus and not something wrong with his lungs again.

The kids and I took off this weekend to visit my parents at their new home on the Oregon coast. it was divine to get away for a few days and the kids had so much fun.

While on my mom's computer, I was scrolling through pictures from the NICU and Jerusha was looking over my shoulder. At one point she asked, "Mommy, who is that?"

Mommy: "That is Joshua when he was first born."
Jerusha: "Who is Joshua again?"
Mommy: "That is my friend Becky's baby." I find a more recent picture. "Do you remember him now?"
Jerusha: "Oh, yeah! He's so cute."
Micah: "Yeah, he is the one who died and Mom and I went to the memorial."
Jerusha (stunned): "*This* is the baby who died?"
Mommy: "Yes, remember when I was crying and I told you what had happened?"
Jerusha, bursting into tears: "But I didn't know it was *this* baby!"
Mommy: "Oh honey."
Jerusha, sobbing: "I loved this baby! Except for Silas, he was my favorite!"

I know Honey, I know. I know.